my life as an independent film...


Travel can be such an ordeal... It's a wonder that I even leave the house anymore. This morning I was up at the crack of dawn (according to my clock anyhow) to catch the bus to Mackenzie to do a little what I will call relief nannying. I had the misfortune to expect that there would be no problem finding seat on the greyhound from FSJ. What a mistake that was.

If I were to have documented my journey on film, it would definitely be classifed in the artsy independent genre. Picture greasy and relatively inept bus depot workers and a colourful cast of characters - to be true to the actual experience they would be mostly rig workers in varying states of "casual" dress with a heavy coating of dust and grime (I appeared overdressed in jeans and my killer norweigan wool scarf... hence why I would be the heroine of this film).

Here is my "film" in a nutshell (as inspired by today's events), my heroine stands in line waiting to purchase her bus ticket. The bus depot is full and bustling with the colourful cast of characters (as described above). Greasy Bus Depot worker struggles with his computer (running Windows98 by the way) and he has to reboot the computer between each transaction greatly slowing down progress of ticket selling. As he struggles with the computer his greasy, greasy (did I mention greasy?) hair flops over his eyes and blinds him with the dripping bits of grease that have trickled onto the surface of his eyes. Heroine glances at clock... the bus was supposed to have left ten minutes ago. She arrived 20 minutes early and has now been at the bus depot for half an hour waiting in the same place in line.

The door to the bus depot opens to let in another weary traveller. Our heroine recognizes traveller as cute boy she knows. Although slightly scruffy and wearing typical traveling clothes, boy is still looking delicious. Delicious looks along with a height of approx. 6ft. and a certain degree of geekness (boy is toting a Popular Science magazine) boy is definitely worthy of conversation. Salutations are exchanged across depot... but boy already has ticket and saunters off to board bus. Frequent stolen glances on the part of both parties occurs. Things seem to be looking up for our film heroine.

The bus ticket is finally purchased and our heroine heads off to board bus... hoping that the bus won't be full and she can sit by slightly scruffy but still delicious boy. She boards bus after individual on crutches while the driver announces to the busload that all of the seats have been sold so no one will get a seat themselves. Our heroine sees boy at back of bus... but her attention is diverted by the seemingly lack of available seats for herself and about 5 other travellers who are standing in the bus aisle looking equally perplexed. Could it be that the inept and greasy bus depot employee oversold the amount of available seats? Heroine and 5 others step off bus while the driver checks tickets again. 15 minutes pass as the driver and bus depot greasers (BDG) try to figure out what the hell happened. As would be expected... the blind and greasy haired BDG cannot count and oversold seats.

So what happens to our heroine and these 5 others? Could it be that the head BDG calls up Teco Taxi to arrange for transport to BDDC (bus depot Dawson Creek)? Could it be that these 6 must wait for half an hour for said transport (the airport shuttle) to arrive? Could our heroine miss all chance of engaging conversation with deliciously scruffy boy thus creating the classic element for this film to be classifed as an artsy independent feature (i.e. no love story line for our heroine)? One would think so. If the events of my day were say perhaps a model for a popular romantic comedy I might have ended up sitting next to some drunk on the bus, only to find solace in witty conversation and veiled flirtation with scruffilicous boy. However, such was not the case... instead after being shuttled to Dawson Creek I boarded another bus, to find that the only seat remaining was the very back seat by the bathroom. The rest of the trip whirled by as I watched the landscape through the windows of the bus. At one point the bus stopped because one of the baggage compartments flew open and the driver had to make sure that nothing had fallen out. I took this photo during our momentary pause... The clouds were beautiful against the blue of the sky. This momentary pause was probably the highlight of the trip... other than the brief cameo appearance by the boy of delicious properties.

Critics of this film would be correct in giving mediocre reviews... definite potential they would say...
the cinematography was excellent... but would like to have seen more of a relationship develop between the heroine and the leading male actor... good effort, but overall lacking the elements to make it a big box office success. However, there will be a select few who will herald the film as a masterpiece... a genius directorial debut... presenting a real life perspective on travel, stolen glances, and those opportunities that continue to elude us.

I'm very tired... must be off to bed. You may try to figure out the inspiration for the delicious boy... a fellow northerner would classify delicious boy with a single gesture - a simple bite to the knuckle. And he (the original, delicious, 6ft. something, Popular Science toting boy) was most definitely worthy of a knuckle bite today. can you guess?