and baby makes three...


Don't let my subject line confuse you.

I'm not pregnant nor have I found a boyfriend nor have I found a couple to hang around with.

Here's the story... this couple I know who are the same age as me who married early are expecting their first baby in December. I'm not too concerned with that, and as Paul Anka is singing right now (quite fittingly I must say) it's my life... or rather it is their life and having a baby seems to be what they would consider to be the next step in their relationship. Hearing heard this news (thanks for the scoop A.) did not make me overly conscious of a biological clock (I had my share of faux motherhood when I was housesitting and babysitting) but I did become a little conscious of my current status: single, student, basement dweller, poor, anti-socialite/social misfit, etc. I'm well aware that this is not a very positive train of thought. But I'm a wee bit tired of my dismal financial situation, basement dwelling, and no romantic dates. I would like to see a little improvement in each of these three areas. Hearing how everyone else seems to be progressing when I feel like I'm stuck in limbo... well it is just a little like a kick to the groin. Well not quite so bad... a slap to the wrist perhaps... or a bang to the funny bone... a tingling sense of pain... an ironic kind of hurt.

My consolation prize... my ego defense levels are quite high which allows me to bask in the belief of my own brilliance. I need something to cling to after all.